This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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