I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
