do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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