I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
