I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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