3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
