I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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