Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize