No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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