THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Randomize
