That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
