i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
