I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
