Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize