I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
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