I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
