yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
