so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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