she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Randomize
