Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
