Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?

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(517): View more from Michigan

Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.

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(248): View more from Michigan

This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"

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(513): View more from Ohio

I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Sorry I blacked out in bed

(859): View more from Kentucky

it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.

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(720): View more from Colorado

Drunk is a universal language darling

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