Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize