school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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