talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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