Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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