before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
