we have pet lesbian snakes
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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