im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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