the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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