I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
