How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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