I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
