They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
