You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
