He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
The uberlube is also flammable
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Randomize
