I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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