Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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