Dude my mom stole all your condoms
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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