WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Enjoy the penises
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
