i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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