fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
