Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize