see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize