Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
lets start a swedish sibling band together
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
