dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
