I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
