she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize