Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
