i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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