all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
