Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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